Patrons at Ember & Thistle, the city’s most exclusive 14-course dining destination, were reportedly stunned this week to discover that their meticulously plated, $340-per-person tasting menu consisted entirely of items identical to free samples typically offered at Costco warehouse stores.
The menu, which includes dishes described as ‘Charred Miniature Frankfurter, Toothpick-Skewered, Bathed in Reduction of Yellow Mustard’ and ‘Single Cracker Adorned with Artisanal Spreadable Cheese Product,’ has drawn rave reviews from food critics who praised its ‘bold reclamation of the overlooked and the humble.’ Head chef Desmond Aldercroft insists the connection to warehouse club sampling is purely coincidental. ‘People keep asking if I got the idea standing near the frozen food aisle on a Saturday afternoon,’ Aldercroft said. ‘I find that reductive. This is fine dining. There is a linen napkin involved.’
Diners have nonetheless reported feelings of deep déjà vu upon tasting the seventh course, a ‘Warm Petite Quiche, Torched Tableside,’ which several described as ‘exactly, and I mean exactly, what the nice older woman near the bakery section hands out on little paper plates.’ One anonymous diner, who spent $680 for two, admitted to shedding a single tear of recognition during the ninth course, a two-inch square of frozen pizza described on the menu as ‘Rustic Wood-Fired Flatbread, Deconstructed.’
Restaurant management has defended the pricing structure, noting that the tasting menu includes ‘ambiance, plateware, and a 45-minute wait between each toothpick.’ A spokesperson added that a forthcoming spring menu will explore ‘the bold, unapologetic terroir of the gas station hot dog roller,’ with reservations already filling up through next November.
