The Millbrook Unified School District announced Monday that it will discontinue traditional homework assignments in favor of what administrators are calling a ‘vibes-based’ evaluation model, in which teachers assign grades according to the general emotional energy a student brings into the classroom each day.
Under the new system, students will no longer submit worksheets or essays. Instead, teachers will observe posture, eye contact, and what officials describe as ‘aura consistency’ to determine whether a student earns an A, a B, or what the district is calling a ‘C, but like, in a supportive way.’ Report cards will now include categories such as ‘Radiates Curiosity,’ ‘Occasionally Present in Spirit,’ and ‘Once Made Eye Contact During a Fire Drill.’
Superintendent Carol Denning defended the change, saying standardized testing had failed to capture the full range of student potential. ‘We were measuring the wrong things,’ Denning explained. ‘A kid might bomb a fractions quiz, sure, but if he walks into third period like he owns the place, that’s leadership. That’s a future CEO. We’re not going to punish that with a rubric.’
Parents have expressed mixed reactions, with some praising the reduced homework load and others confused about how to help their children improve. Local father Greg Osterman said his daughter’s teacher recommended she ‘manifest more focus energy’ after receiving a low mark in Algebra. ‘I asked what that meant practically,’ Osterman said. ‘She told me to light a candle before bed. I don’t know what candle scent corresponds to logarithms, but we’re trying lavender.’
The district plans to phase in vibes-based transcripts for college applications next fall, though several universities have already voiced concern about how to compare an applicant’s ‘Strong Hallway Presence’ score against a traditional GPA.
